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Karpman Drama Triangle

Conflict Needs Players

Perpetrator . Victim  Rescuer 

Dr Stephen Karpman’s 1968 idea, was that conflict needs players and players need roles. The consequential objective of each role is just to have its own needs met – even if temporarily – in order to feel justified in its rationale/behaviour/feeling.

Karpman suggests that in each conflict there are three main roles:
  1. The Persecutor: happy to allocate blame and to ensure that other players know they are in the wrong. They are probably angry, accusative, inflexible and feeling very righteous. In order to have their needs met, they require The Victim; someone onto whom they can project their irritation.
  2. The Victim: The Victim takes the brunt of The Persecutor’s wrath. The Victim feels hard-done-by, got-at, powerless, ashamed, unable to do anything. This is obviously a position of anxiety for most, but psychologically it can actually often bring some comfort. You know where you are when you are The Victim, and it’s easy to seek the pity of others. If The Victim role feels natural to you, then you need to seek out The Persecutor (if you haven’t already got one) but also The Rescuer.
  3. The Rescuer: a big ball of guilt, who needs someone to help, because when you’re the hero to others then you don’t have to deal with your own feelings of anxiety or displacement. The Rescuer appears to be The Victim’s saviour from The Persecutor, but actually cements the others in their negative behaviours – almost giving them permission to stay as the bully or the bullied as it makes everyone feel that they have a purpose.

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Victory Over The Past

Releasing The Victim 

The key to finding victory over your past and inner peace after trauma is in choosing ‘who you want to be now’

What is your identity now?

Are you a victim of the past or a victor over it?

Do you feel you need justice for inner peace?

Healing is the greatest revenge over those that attempt to destroy your mind, body or soul. They don’t expect you to heal emotionally, physically and spiritually, or to get back up and look good and live well. The darkness wants to extinguish your inner light. It wants to turn you to hate, revenge, anger, despair and self pity.

Emotional, physical and spiritual wounds can heal, and there scars can and do fade.

Always remember that you were stronger than whatever darkness or weakness that attacked you. You are alive..

You know you have inner strength. And you know that you are stronger than anything that would try to attack you in the future.

So who do you choose to be now?

A victim?

One of the many wounded?

A survivor?

A thriver?

A victor?

A healer?

Choosing ‘who you are now’, realizing your incredible strength and personal power, letting go of the story and trauma of the past and radically accepting that there are weak and damaged people who are not capable of healing brings about your own victory over the darkness and over the past.

And with that comes high self worth, high self respect, a deep inner peace and your own radical healing.

Surprisingly great examples of these lessons are in the movie ‘Kung Fu Panda 2’ as he ‘remembers’ his traumatic past, chooses who he is now, finds inner peace, and has victory over the darkness and over his tragic past.

Here are a few clips..

Childhood trauma – So who are you now?

Finding inner peace – The battle against evil 

Victory over evil and the past

Love and baby steps,

Silver Girl