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Secondary Depression in Childhood

I am her...

The cause of secondary depression in childhood is the absorbed emotional pain from a loved one suffering from chronic trauma, abuse or neglect. Children are emotionally connected to their mother in-utero – what she feels, they feel. They are emotional sponges and when a loved one is in chronic emotional pain they suffer just as deeply as if the pain was their own.

Many children become highly empathetic at a young age and highly sensitive to the suffering of others.

 

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Being An Empath Is Beautiful

I’m learning that being an empath can be a beautiful thing.. but it means I have to take exceptional care of my emotional, spiritual and physical health in order to be balanced and stay well. It’s taken my lifetime so far to understand myself and my needs as a sensitive. In the past I attracted narcissistic people and suffered from chronic depression, chronic stress, PTSD and multiple autoimmune disorders… It hasn’t been easy.

I’ve had so many lessons to learn regarding self protection, observing not absorbing, responding not reacting, healing the past, what food to eat, personal boundaries, self care, self love, avoiding toxins and toxic people, acceptance, forgiveness, handling emotional stress, how to re-energize, positive thinking … the list goes on.. and on..

I am finally learning to be me and to be well..

This is a good article by Alex Myles regarding accepting, honouring and embracing your high sensitivity. Enjoy :o)

Love & baby steps,

SG x

Princess and the Pea, by Christian Birmingham - my favorite illustrator of children's books.:

Author: Alex Myles

I am an empath.

I have always known I was quite different to many of those around me. Discovering more about the empath personality type has led me to discover a good understanding of myself, and also my relationships with others and the world that surrounds me.

For so many years I felt like an alien on this planet. I often used to say, “I am not of this world.” I didn’t know many people who were like me, who felt things the way I did or who could relate or resonate to things in a similar way to which I did.

The most striking thing for me about being an empath is the way I feel the physical, mental and emotional pain of others as though it were my own. This can be and has been emotionally and physically crippling and it has caused me to suffer tremendously. It is often described as being similar to a sponge, absorbing every emotion and piece of energy around me, and then becoming weighted down by it.

Learning about the empath personality type helped me greatly, as not only do I now understood myself better, I have also learned how to protect myself and not allow outside toxic energies, emotions or behaviors to affect me negatively.

Rather than absorbing all other energies, I now observe them. This prevents me from becoming overwhelmed, exhausted, suffering mentally or physically and being overly emotional.

An empath is someone who is highly sensitive to the energy and emotions emanating from people, animals and everything that exists around them. They have the ability to scan other people’s auras and souls and can intuitively pick up on past, present and even future thoughts and feelings and can quite accurately determine another person’s emotional, mental and physical state.
The saying “never judge a book by its cover” would ring true for an empath. Never would they trust the outer appearance or deceptive superficial exteriors; they will always sense what goes on behind the masks, if they trust their own judgment.

Unfortunately all too often an emapth is led to believe that these paranormal type skills do not exist in today’s world and their words are criticised, disbelieved and are told to be wrong. Downplaying an empath’s intuition, will benefit someone who may be trying to manipulate or use trickery, or someone with very little faith that these abilities exists.

It is vital that, to thrive, the empath personality type needs to work towards learning to trust their own judgment and intuition so that they can be at one with the inherent superpowers they have been born with.

If an empath does not have a good understanding of themselves and how to work with energy rather than pushing against it or absorbing it all, not only can this be emotionally debilitating, it can also result in physical illness with depression, stress and anxiety taking a toll on the body and a very high chance of suffering from the effects of burnout.

Like with all things, there are variations of the empath personality type. Some people will identify strongly, others will only recognise themselves in a few of the following traits:

1. Feels calmer when alone, and, in relationships, requires distance and regular periods of solitude.

2. When in the company of others an empath struggles to work out whether they are feeling their own emotions or the emotions of those around them.

3. Struggles to remain present as the chaos of emotions around them pushes and pulls on an empath’s own thoughts, feelings and emotions.

4. Often says yes to others without thinking of their own needs.

5. In relationships or friendships, very often puts other people before themselves, as though everyone else’s pleasure and happiness is more important than their own.

6. Relationships can often move too fast and can become intense very quickly as the empath connects on a deep, intimate level very quickly due to the ability to absorb other people’s energy and emotions.

7. An empath will often take full responsibility for how others treat them and for anything that goes wrong in relationships. They have a great amount of compassion and can clearly see other people’s emotional baggage and so they make many excuses for why people behave as they do, and this is very often to the detriment of an empath.

8. Tends to connect with people who are suffering and often wants to heal others or try to make the world a better place for them.

9. Can find themselves taking on and absorbing other people’s problems and being used as a sounding board or dumping ground so that others can offload their emotional baggage.

10. Instinctively knows when someone around them is not being truthful.

11. Sometimes empaths just know things, without having any idea of where they gained the information. When trying to work out the truth from a lie it can seem as though the information has been presented forward so that it can be used to help make a decision. The empath should only trust the information if they are highly skilled at reading themselves and others accurately and if paranoia or other information is not clouding their judgement.

12. An empath’s mind is an inquisitive one and they are constantly searching for answers and theorize and philosophise constantly.

13. An empath who is highly in tune with themselves and skilled at reading others will often be able to pick up on someone else’s thought processes even if they are thousands of miles away.

14. Connects very strongly to the animal kingdom and identifies very easily with the emotional and physical pains that animals go through.

15. Is often most at peace and feeling harmonious when spending time with nature and roaming around the outdoors.

16. Can feel the energy surrounding physical things and will often choose clothing or material purchases based on the energy that has attached to them.

17. Very creative and highly imaginative, writing, art, music, painting, dancing, acting, painting, building and designing are a few of the traits that empaths very often are passionate about.

18. An empath will likely get distracted easily when they are doing things they don’t enjoy and will quickly zone out or day dream when placed in situations where their mind is not stimulated.

19. Can struggle to fully relax in the company of others and really let their hair down and have fun, unless they are extremely comfortable and at ease with those surrounding them.

20. Prefers their living space to be clutter free and minimalistic; chaotic surroundings make for chaotic minds for an empath and they have enough inner sensations happening without cluttering their psyche further.

21. Finds it very difficult to be around people who are egotistical or enjoy putting others down to make themselves look better. Empaths will often come to the defense of those that have been rejected or bullied in any way.

22. Crowded places are emotionally overwhelming and downtime is required after social gatherings.

23. Highly sensitive to sounds, smells, bright lights and the feel of certain fabrics.

24. Regularly suffers with fatigue and can feel drained following interactions with others.

25. Can become shy and withdrawn as a method of self-protection. This can result in empaths becoming introverts as a way of avoiding the emotional and physical pain that often stems from interactions.

Other people may see empaths as moody or loners due to the amount of alone or downtime they need. Others may struggle to understand that these things are just part of the personality type and feel comfortable and the most natural ways to exist for an empath. Empaths do like connection, but they need to balance that out by creating a safe space for themselves to exist in alongside it.

Supermarkets, bars/clubs, family gatherings and any crowded event can all be energetically overbearing. Frequent downtime or escapism to a garden, bathroom or kitchen will occur to temporarily break away from the intensely high energy that occurs when many people are close together in the same venue..

Empaths may have an addictive personality and can pick up habits such as drinking alcohol, playing online games or excessively indulging in a particular interest as a form of escapism to blot out feeling so much pain.

Listening to or watching local or worldwide news can be traumatic as the pain or violence the people or creatures involved experience is often transferred onto the empath as though the pain was theirs.

Empaths are free spirits, adventurers, life-seekers, rule breakers, they live outside the box. Often it can seem to others as very unconventional or unorthodox lifestyles. However, these lifestyles often suit an empath perfectly and feel to them the most natural way to live.

As empaths learn more about themselves, many of the traits above can become a thing of the past, or a new way of dealing with them is discovered so that they do not have negative side effects. While many people may recognise themselves in the traits above, there will be some who who see a lot of these things as how they used to be before finding ways to combat or work towards understanding areas so that life becomes less painful.

The key to thriving as an empath is to recognise each of the traits and then spend time thinking about each one and looking at how it may be negatively impacting or hindering a certain part of life. When we have a good understanding of how a certain characteristic affects us, we can work out ways to turn any trait that may have negative side effects into positive ones.

The easiest way to look at the empath type is as though the personality is a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing to have the ability to feel and experience life at such a highly sensitive level, so the joy and love around them will feel like constant electric pulses beating through them. However, the curse is that the lows are felt at an equal intensity.

When empaths learn to protect themselves by becoming consciously aware of how they are allowing outside energy to penetrate them, they are then in a position to turn the curses to blessings so that the painful and toxic energies are not absorbed within the psyche/soul. Empaths must be sure to surround themselves with others whose energies vibrate at a similar frequency so that they are not vulnerable and exposed to energy that can cause them harm. Self-protection is vital.

Being an empath really is a beautiful way to live and to experience life. Finely tuning our frequency so that we keep our energy levels high and refuse to take on or absorb anything that will harm us is the simplest, harmonious and magically unique way to exist.

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Basics On Training Your Empathic Abilities

Psychic Advice

There are three major forms of psychic abilities: clairvoyance, which in French means “clear seeing” and involves seeing psychic visions; clairaudience, which is hearing psychic messages; and clairsentience, or empathy, which is receiving psychic feelings or impressions. Empathy is the easiest form of psychic information to receive, but it is the hardest to define, because you must be clear about whether what you are feeling is yours, or if you are picking it up from someone, from someplace, or from something else.

People who are empathic are very sensitive to everything and everyone around them, and have often been told that they are “too sensitive”, particularly throughout their childhood. Empaths are heartful, caring, kind people who want to please and make other people happy, and often tend to do volunteer work, or to work in service to others in some way. Empaths can have a tendency to be overweight, particularly in childhood, because they use their weight as a type of shield to protect themselves from other people’s energies.

Empathic people can be “psychic sponges”, picking up and absorbing energy everywhere they go, which is why it is very important for empaths to have strong boundaries of protection. It is absolutely essential for those who are empathic to envision a bubble of white light around them at all times as a psychic shield.

For those who are extremely sensitive, it is even better to imagine layers of boundaries like a rainbow surrounding them, beginning with a layer of red around the body, then a layer of orange surrounding that, then yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet, and finally a thick layer of white light surrounding all the layers. Those who can be highly emotional may also want to put these rainbow layers around their heart, because empaths tend to experience the world through their heart, which can be challenging and painful.

Empathically sensitive people must be very diligent in cleansing themselves of other people’s energies. One can release energy by using an affirmation such as:

“I am willing to work with all that is mine, and I release all that is not mine”.

It can also be helpful to affirm:

“I am willing to receive all that is for the highest good of all for me to know, and I am protected from all else”.

This will create a filter, so you will only receive information that is important for you to know and act upon.

You can use meditation and visualization for cleansing yourself energetically. You can visualize the doorway to your home and office as a shower of light that washes away all negative energy from all those who pass through it. You can also release negative energies by washing your hands in cold water up to your elbow, or standing barefoot in the grass. Whenever you take a shower, you can envision all negative energy being cleansed from you.

Meditation can also be very helpful for getting centered within yourself and getting to know what is going on within you. The most challenging thing about developing and honing empathic abilities is learning to discern between what feelings, sensations and emotions are yours, and what belongs to someone or something else.

Before you leave your home, take a moment to check in with yourself to determine how you are feeling. Then get a sense of what you feel inside you as you encounter different people and places throughout your day. If you meet a person or a group of people and find yourself feeling suddenly angry, depressed, sad, or agitated, or even having a sudden headache, tension or other aches and pains, then you may be absorbing energy and emotions from others. Ask yourself, “Is this mine?” to determine whether what you are feeling is yours or not.

Always watch out for sudden shifts in your mood or emotions. If you enter a place and suddenly feel tense, uneasy, gloomy, or even frightened, or if you get physical sensations such as chills, gooseflesh, or dizziness, then you are picking up energies from what has transpired there. Places and things absorb energy from the experiences they have “witnessed”, and therefore hold a historic record of significant emotional events. Empaths especially need protection in emotional places, like funerals, cemeteries, haunted buildings, crime scenes, etc. Empaths or clairvoyants can intuitively read the energetic impressions that have embedded themselves in a particular place or thing using the psychic gift of psychometry, which is often employed by psychic detectives.

One of the ways for an empath to read psychic energy is through the hands. Psychometry involves touching an object or photograph to pick up on psychic impressions, which can come in the form of certain feelings, emotions, sensations, visions or quick flashes. Empathic people can also use their hands to read energy from people, making them outstanding healers, nurses, doctors and massage therapists. Empaths can feel when and where energy is flowing harmoniously or inharmoniously, and how to correct and balance it in people, and even in places. Empathic people are also excellent at real estate, interior design, and Feng Shui, because they can pick up on what other people want and need, and what makes others happy or uncomfortable – so they are also ideal matchmakers!

Trust is always key to developing intuition. You must learn to pay attention to the feelings and impressions that you receive wherever you go. You may have a feeling that you don’t want to go into a certain place, or you don’t want to connect with a certain person – always trust that those feelings are there for a reason, whether it makes rational sense to you or not. Remember that intuition does not come from the rational side of the brain, it comes from a place of higher knowing that is meant to guide you and keep you safe, so allow yourself to always trust what you feel.

Source : askgrace.com

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The Wounded Healer

Empathetic people often try to heal the wounds of the most challenging characters and then feel very upset when they get kicked.

Remember that your job is to shine your light and be the Mona Lisa smile in the Universe rather than force awareness on those who have the equal right to sit in the shade.

All are beautiful and take the journey when and if they are ready

~ Veronica Farmer

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Healing the Wounded Child

As the wounded child heals, he learns to accept all people – even those whose behavior was evil towards him. He develops a greater understanding of others and for why they behave the way they do. This sets him free to forgive and to stop judging and to stop fixing.

Wisdom through suffering, acceptance, compassion and forgiveness heals the wounded child and from their own wisdom and experiences they can then go on to assist in the healing of other wounded children.

Love & baby steps,

SG x

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The Wounded Child Archetype

Light Attributes

Awakens compassion and desire to serve other Wounded Children.

Opens the learning path of forgiveness.

Shadow Attributes

Blames all dysfunctional relationships on childhood wounds.

Resists moving on through forgiveness.

The Wounded Child archetype holds the memories of the abuse, neglect, and other traumas that we have endured during childhood.

This may be the pattern people relate to the most, particularly since it has become the focus of therapy. The Wounded Child is accepted as a major culprit in the analysis of adult suffering.

The painful experiences of the Wounded Child archetype often awaken a deep sense of compassion and a desire to find a path of service aimed at helping other Wounded Children.

From a spiritual perspective, a wounded childhood cracks open the learning path of forgiveness.

The Shadow Aspect

The shadow aspect may manifest as an abiding sense of self-pity, a tendency to blame your parents for your current shortcomings and to resist moving on through forgiveness.

Evaluation

Choosing the Wounded Child suggests that you credit the painful and abusive experiences of your childhood with having a substantial influence on your adult life. Many people blame their Wounded Child, for instance, for all their subsequent dysfunctional relationships.

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