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The Gossip Archetype

Light Attribute:

Awakens consideration for the feelings of others.

Honouring trust.

Shadow Attributes:

Thrives on the power of passing on private or secret information.

Betraying confidences.

The Gossip archetype is associated with rumor-spreading, backbiting, and passing along information that is exaggerated, harmful, and intended to disempower.

On a professional level, the shadow Gossip manifests as publishing misleading information, creating damaging rumors, or hounding celebrities for their photos.

The Shadow Aspect

Although everyone is prone to listening to and spreading gossip in some way, a Gossip archetype thrives on the power that is generated by passing around information that is secret or private.

Most people would hesitate to choose this archetype because of its negative implications, yet many others make their living in the business of political, social, and entertainment gossip in a positive way.

The Light Aspect

The archetype is connected to lessons of truth, integrity, and honoring the trust another has placed in you.

Evaluation

In assessing your connection to the Gossip, review how many of your life lessons have emerged from participating in gossip that has harmed another, and then coping with the consequences.

Do you measure the quality of a relationship by whether a person is willing to share secrets with you?

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Movies Portraying ‘Gossips’

Watching movies related to one of your core archetype especially when going through the process of healing is a powerful tool to help you understand yourself (your motivations, your passions, your fears – why you behave the way you do).

SG x

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The Knight Archetype

Knight . Rescuer . Warrior

Light Attributes

Loyalty, romance, and chivalry.

A love of honour

Shadow Attributes

Allegiance to a destructive ruler or principle.

Romantic delusions.

 The Knight archetype is primarily associated with chivalry, courtly romance, protection of the Princess, and going to battle only for honorable causes.

The Knight serves his King or Lord and so this archetype has spiritual overtones as well of service and devotion. Loyalty and self-sacrifice are the Knight’s great virtues, along with a natural ability to get things done.

A true Knight, like the Mystic, walks the fine line between self-sacrifice and self-neglect.

The Shadow Aspect

The Black Knight donning dark armor and riding a black horse represents the shadow characteristics of this archetype, especially the absence of honor and chivalry.

Somewhat like the Warrior, the shadow Knight manifests as loyalty to a questionable ruler or principle. In its negative aspect, the Knight can also, like the Rescuer, fall into a pattern of saving others but ignoring his own needs.

Evaluation

Look for a pattern of service to others that straddles the line between self-sacrifice and self-neglect.

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Movies portraying the ‘Knight Archetype’

Watching movies related to one of your core archetype especially when going through the process of healing your shadow aspect is a powerful tool to help you understand yourself (your motivations, your passions, your fears – why you behave the way you do).

SilverGirl

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The Rebel Archetype

Rebel . Anarchist . Revolutionary . Political Protester .  Nonconformist . Pirate

Light:

Challenges authority to effect social change.

Rejects spiritual systems that do not serve inner needs.

Shadow:

Rejects legitimate authority out of anger.

Rebels out of peer pressure or fashion.

Our images of the Rebel may be too closely aligned with cliches of youth culture to let us see the deeper significance of this valuable archetype.

Whether politically inclined like Martin Luther King, Jr., Betty Friedan, or Lech Walensa, or an artistic innovator such as Van Gogh, Joyce, or Coltrane, the Rebel is a key component of all human growth and development.

The Rebel in a support group can be a powerful aid in helping the group break out of old tribal patterns. It can also help you see past tired preconceptions in your field of professional or creative endeavor.

The Rebel can also lead you to reject spiritual systems that do not serve your inner need for direction and to seek out more appropriate paths.

The Shadow Rebel

The shadow Rebel, conversely, may compel you to rebel out of peer pressure or for the sake of fashion, and so become mired in another manifestation of conformity.

The shadow Rebel may also reject legitimate authority simply because it is asking you to do something you find difficult or unpleasant.

Evaluation

Be especially careful in evaluating your rebellious impulses; look for a lifelong pattern of rebelling against the establishment. But even if the Rebel is not part of your intimate circle of archetypes, you probably have it to some extent and should pay attention to its urgings.

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Movies Portraying ‘Rebels’

Watching movies related to one of your core archetype especially when going through the process of healing your shadow aspect is a powerful tool to help you understand yourself (your motivations, your passions, your fears – why you behave the way you do).

SilverGirl

 

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The End Of Martyrdom

 

Guest Post: Elizabeth Gilbert

Dear Ones –

I saw this quote the other day Brené Brown‘s Facebook page, and it stopped me in my tracks.

Does this quote resonate with anyone out there? Has anyone else out there struggled with the tricky question of confusing “love” with “putting everyone else’s life ahead of yours”?

Does anyone else out there think this is a particularly pervasive problem for women? Do you see your own mothers and grandmothers, maybe, reflected in this sentiment? Or perhaps your sisters, or your dearest friends?

Have you watched women whom you adore and admire allow their lives to be drained away to the very depths — constantly giving themselves to others — until there is nothing left to give?

Men do it, too — but I think women do it more…am I right?

Have you witnessed the depression, the vacancy, the emptiness, the sickness, and the despair that can result?

Or have you done that to yourself — drained yourself, over-given of yourself, until you can’t even find yourself in the story of your own life at all anymore? Have you let it get to the point that you resent every single one of the people you have put before you? And are you still mistakenly calling that “love”?

Or is the better name for it “martyrdom”?

My friend Iva and I have had so many conversations about this over the years — about our shared sense that the Age of Martyrdom is coming to an end…and that it must end. We must choose a different path. Iva and I remind each other all the time of the vows that we have sworn about our own lives, vows that say: “I’m not going to burn at the stake this time…not for anyone.”

Not doing it anymore.

I will love people freely and lightly and happily, or I will let them go.

I will allow people — especially other adults — to be responsible for their own lives. If other people are falling down hellholes, I will not tumble down those hellholes with them out of some mistaken sense of loyalty. (Compassion does not mean jumping into a pit of flame with anyone.) I will not stand in the fire anymore for anyone, or burn up my life for anyone, and mistakenly call that love.

I have a friend who said recently to me, “I liked you better when you were depressed. I was more comfortable with you then.”

My reply: “Well, I loved you then and I love you now. But I’m sorry — I won’t stay depressed just to keep you company, or make you feel better. I really do love you, but I don’t love you that much.” (Truth is, I don’t love ANYONE that much — because that ain’t love.)

I will not be loyal to suffering — neither yours or mine.

I will not be faithful to dysfunction — neither yours or mine.

I will not give you more than I (safely and sanely) have to give.

I will remember that we must take people as we find them, and that sometimes (as Iyanla always reminds us) we must leave them there.

I will not stay in the darkness for ANYONE, and I won’t allow myself to be manipulated by anyone who feels they must drag me into their darkness for their own comfort…or that, if I refuse to stay in the darkness with them, I don’t love them.

No.

My life is an upward search — moving stubbornly toward the light — and you can come along with me, or I’ll see you later.

I will always take care of myself — because I recognize that if I don’t take care of myself, then I can never offer my useful service or my authentic love to anybody.

I will always work to fill my soul with grace and enthusiasm. Whatever energy overflows from me, I will happily and generously share it. But I will only share the overflow, because the rest of it, I need. I will not drain my wellspring to the dregs for anyone ever again, and mistakenly call that love.

This is the pledge of the End of Martyrdom.

Who’s with me?

ONWARD,
LG

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The Saboteur Archetype

(Everyone has this Archetype)

Light:

Highlights your fear of self-empowerment and the changes it would bring to your life.

Shadow:

Induces self-destructive behaviour or the desire to undermine others.

The Saboteur archetype is made up of the fears and issues related to low self-esteem that cause you to make choices in life that block your own empowerment and success.

As with the Victim and Prostitute, you need to face this powerful archetype that we all possess and make it an ally.

When you do, you will find that it calls your attention to situations in which you are in danger of being sabotaged, or of sabotaging yourself. Once you are comfortable with the Saboteur, you learn to hear and heed these warnings, saving yourself untold grief from making the same mistakes over and over.

Ignore it, and the shadow Saboteur will manifest in the form of self-destructive behavior or the desire to undermine others.

This may be the most difficult of all the archetypes to understand, because its name is associated with betrayal. Yet the purpose of this archetype is not to sabotage you, but to help you learn the many ways in which you undermine yourself.

How often do you set new plans in motion, only to end up standing in your own way because of the fears that undermine those optimistic plans. Or you begin a new relationship and then destroy it because you begin to imagine a painful outcome. You begin a working relationship with another person and find yourself once again in a power struggle that could be settled peacefully — but you fall into the same destructive pattern because you fear the other person.

To learn how to become aware of the action of the Saboteur within, ask yourself these questions:

  • What fears have the most authority over me? List three.
  • What happens when a fear overtakes me? Does it make me silent?
  • Do I allow people to speak for me?
  • Do I agree to some things out of fear that I otherwise would not agree to?
  • Have I let creative opportunities pass me by?
  • How conscious am I in the moment that I am sabotaging myself?
  • Am I able to recognize the Saboteur in others?
  • Would I be able to offer others advice about how to challenge one’s Saboteur? If so, what would it be?

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Movies Portraying ‘Saboteurs’

Watching movies related to one of your core archetype especially when going through the process of healing is a powerful tool to help you understand yourself (your motivations, your passions, your fears – why you behave the way you do).

SilverGirl

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The Spiritual Teacher Archetype

Guide . Sage . Spiritual Master . Preacher . Evangelist . Wise Woman . Crone

Light:

Represents the nature of the Divine in life and in yourself.

Shadow:

Places financial gain and control over imparting spiritual insight.

The Guide takes the role of Teacher to a spiritual level, teaching not only the beliefs and practices that make up established religions, but also the overarching principle of seeing love in every aspect of life.

Clearly you do not have to be a professional Preacher or Guru to have this archetype, as we can all learn to lead others spiritually through developing our own intuitive spiritual awareness and passing on whatever we have learned with genuine humility.

The Shadow Aspect

The shadow aspect of the Guide is visible in many modern televangelists and gurus of various traditions who are more interested in financial gain and controlling their followers than in imparting genuine spiritual insight.

Evaluation

To count this archetype as part of your support group, however, you will need to discern in your life a continuing pattern of devoting yourself to teaching others from your own spiritual insights. This presupposes that you have gained wisdom through some combination of self-disciplined practice and study and perhaps spontaneous spiritual experiences.

Wisdom also comes with age, and so the Crone or Wise Woman represents the ripening of natural insight and the acceptance of what is, allowing one to pass that wisdom on to others.

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Movies Portraying the ‘Guide’ (Spiritual Teacher)

Watching movies related to one of your core archetype especially when going through the process of healing is a powerful tool to help you understand yourself (your motivations, your passions, your fears – why you behave the way you do).

SilverGirl