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Silent Rage And What To Do About It

Anger Management


Silent rage is no secret, even though it’s silent. Most communication is nonverbal, and you can rest assured that your eyes, expressions, voice tone and mannerisms are communicating your suppressed rage and anger.

Keeping it inside is certainly better than exploding on someone, it’s just not a long term solution. silent rageIt got this way because you don’t know what to do about your anger, andit just kept building.

It’s time to take care of this, before it gets much worse. There are answers here, and you can take the necessary steps. You’ve got what it takes to get the job done.


 

Where Does Silent Rage Come From?

 

It never “comes out of nowhere” like a lot of people think. There is always a reason for all kinds of anger, including rage.

So, what is rage and how is it different from plain old anger? Good question. Rage is a result of a lot of anger, pain, confusion, feelings of helplessness and a little bit of “I don’t care any more.”That’s why it’s so dangerous. Let’s look at where it comes from:

    • You were hurt somehow, and your wounds never healed.

 

    • You feel like nobody really understands, or cares.

 

    • Your needs have not been met, and you’re very, very frustrated.

 

    • You may feel very justified in your thoughts and feelings at a certain level.

 

  • You give way too much attention to the things that infuriate you, and give you a negative view of the world.

It’s only silent because you’re afraid of what will happen if you let it out. You’re not a bad person, and you really don’t want to harm anyone…but the rage kind of makes you crazy. That’s the way rage works.

silent rage

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Three Steps To Deal With Silent Rage

 

The only reason you’re still reading this is because you have some hope that things can get better. You are tired of the silent rage, and you don’t want it to explode or turn into an illness.

You’re a good person, and that’s why you don’t like all of the anger inside. So, here are the steps:

    1. First, the wounds have to be healed. Review the ways in which you were hurt, starting in your childhood and leading up to today. Include major losses, and unmet needs. Write it all down. This has been found to be healing, all by itself. If you feel you need more help, search this site, or seek counseling for further support in your healing.

 

    1. The next step is to begin to learn to love yourself. I know, this is a tall order, but you can do it. One of the reasons your rage is silent is that you have a good heart and you don’t want it coming out and hurting those you love.

 

  1. Finally, you need to shift your mental focus to what is good, right and working about you and the world around you. This Goodfinding journaling process will help you with that.

You’ve already taken some important steps to healing silent rage, just by being with me at this point.

You can do this. You have the will and determination and good heart right there inside you.

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Your Feelings Have Messages for You (So Stop Ignoring Them)

Emotions Talking

“But feelings can’t be ignored, no matter how unjust or ungrateful they seem.” ~Anne Frank

As a sensitive person, I have a complicated relationship with my feelings. They are the sensors I extend out into the world, to pull it in. They are the guides that help me decide what works or doesn’t work for me. But there are also times when my feelings rise with such force that I am left gasping for breath.

Then, I am tempted by the thought that not feeling so much would have definitely made things easier.

And yet, I don’t feel all my feelings. Parts of my emotional life feel numb. For a long time, like many people, expressing anger was extremely difficult for me.

We’re all like this, whether we think of ourselves as sensitive and emotional or logical and rational. Our emotional lives are a patchwork made up of beliefs we have internalized and things that we have seen modeled.

We are never taught how to relate to our emotions, and so, we must make our own way through.

Here are some things I have learned that might help you:

There is no such thing as a negative emotion.

We are trained to think of emotions as positive and negative. But in truth, every emotion serves an important function. What would we be without anger to protect our boundaries? Where would we be without fear that tells us that something is wrong? How can we let go of things if we never allow ourselves to feel sad?

We confuse a negative or destructive expression of a feeling with the feeling itself. Yes, unhealthy expressions can be harmful. But if we banish some feelings and don’t allow them to move through us, we get stuck in places that we belonged to a long time ago.

These are no longer our reality, but we go on living as if they are.

Giving up the belief that certain emotions are okay to feel and certain emotions are not okay is the first step to help us process our emotions.

But many of us don’t even know what is it that we are feeling. How are we supposed to channel something that we can’t even name?

Expanding our emotional vocabulary can tell us where we are in our emotional lives. 

Think about what happened when you first started learning new words. You had access to a whole new universe. You had a way of naming your experience more precisely than you had before.

Cognitive psychologists are now finding that a more precise vocabulary (for example, having specific names for light blues and dark blues, as Russian speakers do) helps make people quicker at identifying subtle differences.

In a similar way, if we can name our emotions precisely, we can identify subtle nuances and hone into what exactly we are feeling. That can help us take the most effective emotional action.

Karla McLaren, the author of the wonderful The Language of Emotions talks eloquently about the different forms in which one single emotion can show up. Did you know that indifference can be a form of anger? So can coldness, resentment, and impatience.

In its mood state, anger can show up as sarcasm and arrogance. And of course, we know anger when it erupts in rage and violence. But bitterness is also an intense form of anger, albeit a hardened, calcified form.

Seeing that anger shows up in different degrees and forms can help us get straight to the heart of the problem.

McLaren tells us that the question anger poses is: What must be protected? What must be restored? If we are feeling resentful or cold, where have we given too much of ourselves away? What can we do to enforce limits that will make us feel protected?

If we do this, we catch anger before it morphs into an even stronger form and becomes harder to deal with. We also stay on course instead of getting lost and disoriented about the direction of our lives. For me, the belief that “Nice people don’t get angry” meant that I stayed in an exploitative work situation for several years.

As soon as anger came up for me, I dropped it. I would work harder, be better till someone noticed me. But what I didn’t realize was that the increasing fear and shakiness that I was feeling was a direct result of rejecting my anger.

How can you not feel scared and insecure when you have opened yourself up to harm?

The fear had risen because I had banished the protective energies of anger. I was, indeed, in undefended psychic territory.

So, fear, another so-called “negative” emotion comes bearing its own important messages.

My fear took the form of confusion and disorientation. Your fear might take some other form, depending on what the situation is.

In its diffuse form, McLaren tells us, fear can be experienced as our caution, uneasiness, or instinct. You might feel disconcerted, doubtful, or concerned that something is off. You might feel jumpy, nervous, or suspicious.

At the root is the same feeling. It’s showing up in different ways, and asking you to probe for answers.

Is the fear natural? Is it tied to something that is happening around you? What can you do about it?

But what if you get stuck in one feeling? What if you have repetitive fearful thoughts that don’t track back to real dangers? Then, it’s likely that your feeling response is locked in place.

This often happens is we have experienced trauma in the past. We remain hyper-vigilant long after the traumatic event is over. If this is the case, we need professional help to release the traumatic material.

But in the normal course of our days, feelings naturally ebb and flow. They direct our attention to what is happening in our lives. They urge us to take action.

Venting and repressing feelings are not the only choices we have. 

But what action should we take? Isn’t that the trickiest part of dealing with feelings?

One of the reasons that I didn’t allow myself to feel anger in my work situation was because I was not sure what I could do with it. Expressing it felt dangerous, because I had stored up so much emotion. Repressing it felt like the only other thing to do.

Many of us get stuck in this tricky space.

We keep hearing that the only way out is through the feeling, but doing that doesn’t seem viable without expressing it and hurting someone or harming something in the process.

One of the ways that I am learning to work with my feelings is to first consciously experience the feeling myself. One way to safely release anger, for example, is to beat pillows for ten minutes or so. That lessens the intensity of the rising emotion.

Another practice that McLaren suggests is called “conscious complaining.” You sit all by yourself and complain loudly about all the things that are going wrong in your life. Again, we are attempting to use up some of the energy of the feeling, and move it out of our systems.

For fear, we can put on some music and imitate the shaky energy of the feeling, and lessen the burden that it is putting on us physically.

Remember that emotions, by their very definition, are energies that move us to take some action. So, a physical release is important.

Something is rising, and we are letting it move us. We are now just choosing that movement consciously.

Once we have released some of the energy of the emotion, we can then think of what action we can take to address the issue that it has brought up. For example, if we are angry, how can we restore the boundary?

One important realization I had about anger was after reading Harriet Lerner’s book The Dance of Anger. In it, she tells us that venting anger is often ineffective. We are trying to convert someone else to our point of view. If they don’t agree to what we are saying, we often get stuck in the space of trying to get them to agree.

Believing that we need agreement is what keeps us stuck. We are, in effect, maintaining the status quo.

If it’s something important to us, a limit we are choosing to place, then we don’t need permission. What we need is the clarity and courage to enforce this limit and to deal with the anxiety that rocking the boat often brings.

This emotional process has been a learning curve for me. It is not easy and I often falter. But whenever I can experience my feelings and move through them, I feel a sense of ease.

I guess it’s because I am not invalidating my experiences. I am owning them, letting them speak their truth.

What about you? What will opening to all your own feelings do for you?

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Constructive Anger vs. Suppressed Anger (Depression)

The Upside of Anger: 6 Psychological Benefits of Getting MadPost image for The Upside of Anger: 6 Psychological Benefits of Getting Mad
We tend to think of anger as a wild, negative emotion, but research finds that anger also has its positive side.

There are all sorts of good sensible, civilised reasons to avoid getting angry.

Not only does it make you feel bad, it makes you do stupid things without noticing the risks and it can be self-destructive.

As a result civilised people do their best to suppress, redirect and mask their anger. Most of us treat our anger as though it’s unreasonable, unshowable and unmentionable.

Chronic suppression of anger is a major cause of depression and low motivation.

Like all emotions anger has its purposes, which can be used to good effect.

Anger is a motivating force

You sometimes hear people talking about using anger as a motivating force by ‘turning anger into positive energy’. In fact anger itself is a kind of positive energy and a powerful motivating force. Research has shown that anger can make us push on towards our goals in the face of problems and barriers.

In one study participants were shown objects they associated with a reward. Some, though, were first exposed to angry faces. Those shown the angry faces were more likely to want objects they were subsequently exposed to.

When we see something as beneficial, we want it more when we’re angry. So, when used right, constructive anger can make you feel strong and powerful and help push you on to get what you want.

Angry people are more optimistic

It may sound like an odd thing to say, but angry people have something in common with happy people. That’s because both tend to be more optimistic.

Take one study of fear of terrorism carried out in the aftermath of the 9/11 terrorist attacks. In this study those experiencing anger expected fewer attacks in the future. In contrast those experiencing more fear were more pessimistic about the future and expected further attacks.

Anger can benefit relationships

Anger is a natural reaction to being wronged by someone else and it’s a way of communicating that sense of injustice. But society tells us anger is dangerous and we should hide it. What does this do to our personal relationships?

Oddly enough research has shown that hiding anger in intimate relationships can be detrimental. The problem is that when you hide your anger, your partner doesn’t know they’ve done something wrong. And so they keep doing it. And that doesn’t do your relationship any good.

The expression of anger, if justifiable and aimed at finding a solution rather than just venting, can actually benefit and strengthen relationships.

 Anger provides self-insight

Anger can also provide insight into ourselves, if we allow it.

A sample of Americans and Russians were asked about how recent outbursts of anger had affected them. 55% claimed that getting angry had let to a positive outcome. One top of this one-third said that anger provided an insight into their own faults.

If we can notice when we get angry and why, then we can learn what to do to improve our lives. Anger can motivate self-change.

 Anger reduces violence

Although anger often precedes physical violence, it can also be a way of reducing violence. That’s because it’s a very strong social signal that a situation needs to be resolved. When others see the signal they are more motivated to try and placate the angry party.

If you’re still not convinced that anger might reduce violence, imagine a world without anger where people had no method for showing how they felt about injustice. Might they jump straight to violence?

Anger as negotiation strategy

Anger can be a legitimate way to get what you want. In one study of negotiation participants made larger concessions and fewer demands of an angry person than one who was happy.

So there’s some evidence that anger can be used as a negotiation strategy, but it’s more complicated than that. You can’t just lose your rag and expect to win everything you want.

Anger is likely to work best when it’s justified, if you appear powerful and when the other side’s options are limited.

In the right circumstances, then, it’s possible to both get mad and get even.

Deadly sin or constructive emotion?

I say anger can reduce violence, benefit relationships, promote optimism and be a useful motivating force, but it can just as easily be destructive.

That’s the wonder of human emotions: happy isn’t always good and angry isn’t always bad (although it may feel that way). An unhappy person is also more likely to spot mistakes and an angry person is highly motivated to act. We need reminding that even scary and dangerous emotions have their upsides, as long as they are used for the correct purpose.

The likely features of constructive anger are:

  • that the person who caused the anger is present,
  • that it is justified and proportionate to the wrongdoing,
  • and it is expressed as the first step in trying to solve a problem rather than just venting bad feeling.

People seem to unconsciously understand the benefits of anger. One study found participants who were about to play a game requiring them to be confrontational were more likely to listen to angry music beforehand or think back to things that have made them angry. They then went on to perform better in the task because they felt more angry.

Used right, anger can be a handy tool. But use with caution as people find anger the most difficult of all the emotions to control.

Source: spring.org.uk

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Keeping Yourself Safe

Escaping A Narcissist

The most dangerous time for a abused woman is when she leaves her abuser or threatens to leave.

Do not take this lightly. This is the time when most women are violently attacked or killed. Whether they have ever hit you or not is irrelevent, if he is controlling you and shows the warning signs below, he can be very dangerous.

The sudden fear of abandonment and his losing control of you .. can cause the narcissist to go into a ‘narcissistic rage’.

Have a plan, a strategy, take your time (my escape plan took 6 months of planning). Find a safe house, support, a counsellor who specializes in abuse and trauma – they can help with a plan prior to your escape and emotionally support you, go to a battered women’s shelter, have a talk, get advice, be smart, get into survival mode, save whatever money you can, sell things  – Remember psychological abuse is the same as physical abuse and shelters recognize this..  call an abused women’s support line, they are experts. Find the right help, someone who hears you and supports you. If they don’t take you seriously, find another. If they don’t understand the dangers of psychological abuse and narcissists – keep looking until you do find one that does… Don’t remain passive about your survival. When you have reached the point where leaving terrifies you but staying is a death sentence (your fear of staying is greater than your fear of leaving) – you need to start planning and if this means keeping secrets and hiding money for your own survival – so be it.

Remember baby steps..

You can escape, work on changing yourself and the reasons you attract narcissistic partners and have a better future.

I am happy to answers any questions for anyone in this situation.

If you intuitively know you could be in potential physical danger – watch the movies .. Fear with Reese Witherspoon, Enough with Jennifer Lopez, Sleeping with the Enemy with Julia Roberts. They helped me clearly see the danger I was in, and to be careful.

For some time I had to remove myself physically by getting my own place, but I had to wait until he found someone else before he would detach emotionally.

I never wanted to leave him, l did love him but for my own survival and sanity, leaving him was my only option. I sought professional help for my issues but that was never going to be an option for him.

We can dearly love and attract people who are not good for us, especially if we come from a history of childhood neglect, abuse or trauma. The key to change is to change yourself.

x I agree 100% with this. You may need a safety plan to get help. What this really means in practice is living a life in which you are becoming independant  enough(through education or work, learning to drive, saving a little money, saving clothes and your papers) to take care of yourself so when you leave you are stronger and can take care of your basic needs and that of your family.

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Steps to Emotional Recovery

Don't cry

“Pain (any pain–emotional, physical, mental) has a message. The information it has about our life can be remarkably specific, but it usually falls into one of two categories: “We would be more alive if we did more of this,” and, “Life would be more lovely if we did less of that.” Once we get the pain’s message, and follow its advice, the pain goes away.” ~ Peter McWilliams

Have you noticed how afraid we all are of feeling any emotional pain? And how we would do anything in our power to avoid it? Nobody wants it. We all try to get rid of it. We all try to hide and run away from it, and the irony is that the more we try to reject and resist it, the more intense it gets and the longer it stays with us.

Its ok to feel

Allowing emotions is healthy~ working through emotions is love of self~ soul~O

We all have our ups and downs. We all experience emotional pain from time to time. But that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with us. It doesn’t mean we’re ‘broken’ or ‘defective’. On the contrary. It only shows that we are human. That we have feelings and emotions.

For 10 years,  I got bashed for my emotions. I will never again let someone tell me not show emotions or cry. I'll be damn!!!

Today I would like to share with you 12 tips for recovering from emotional pain. So that you can continue living your life in peace and harmony and do the things you so much enjoy doing.

1. Embrace with grace all that you face.

“Everything you are against weakens you. Everything you are for empowers you.” ~ Wayne Dyer 

Let go of any feelings of anger, disgust or frustration you might have towards yourself, your emotional pain and your current reality. Resist nothing. Embrace with grace all that you face. Surrender to what is. Accept what you’re going through. All your thoughts, feelings and frustrations. Accept your emotional pain as if you have chosen it. 

i am not fine at all

2. Give yourself time.

It takes time to drive out the darkness from our minds and our hearts. It takes time to accept the presence of emotional pain into our lives. So give yourself time. Time to rest, time to heal and time to fully recover. Be gentle with yourself and trust that everything happens exactly as it’s supposed to happen. 

I remember feeling this way every day .. All I needed was that time to heal myself. Time to grow. Time to learn. Time to realize. People need time and patience.

Everything is going to be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end #PICHICHI #Mentality

3. Let go of control – Allow

“There is a time for being ahead, a time for being behind; a time for being in motion, a time for being at rest; a time for being vigorous, a time for being exhausted; a time for being safe, a time for being in danger. The Master sees things as they are, without trying to control them. She lets them go their own way, and resides at the center of the circle.” ~ Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching 

Emotional Fatigue

Always...M.E. is horrible.  It isn't 'fatigue' or 'tiredness', it is complete exhaustion.

IT IS TIME TO REST ~ "It is an ever living battle to remind myself that I am enough, you are enough…we have done enough, we have enough, we will always have enough…we know enough……etc……….that ENOUGH BATTLE is the one that never lets us rest" Melody via her BraveGirlsClub blog entry: ….rest is not weakness…..

Please refrain yourself from making comments like: “I have been feeling like this for far too long. I should be fine by now.  Why does it take so long for this pain to be gone?” and so on. Allow things to follow their natural course. Allow yourself to heal at your own pace. Let go of the need to control the healing process. Let go of the need to speed up your recovery.

4. Suffer consciously.

Observe your emotional pain, your anguish and frustrations. Observe the constant stream of negative thoughts that run through your mind. The dreadful stories that keep feeding your pain, but choose not to identify yourself with them. See yourself as the one who’s observing all that emotional pain and all that discomfort. But don’t make the pain part of who you are. Don’t make it your person life story. Don’t claim it as your own.

#AWAKENINGWOMEN: It is safe to feel emotions.   www.kimberleyjones.com  Beautiful image created by my graphics angel, Jennifer Cairns   Daybreak Design   Info@daybreakdesign.ca

“Suffering consciously is when you feel, sense and accept the suffering. It is not suffering anymore it is just pain. To be suffering you must have an unhappy me with a story and the world that is doing it to me.” ~ Eckhart Tolle

It's OK to Feel Bad  Go ahead and admit it. You have to acknowledge your disappointment in order to get past it and move on!

5. Love your pain away – Self Care

Nobody likes to be in the presence of pain. We all want to get rid of it. To run as far away from it as we possibly can. But there are times when pain demands our presence, our focus and attention. There are times when pain demands to be felt. So take the time to know your emotional pain. To nourish it, to understand it. Don’t curse your pain. Love your pain and it will go away.

Be gentle on yourself, you are hurting.

Be kind.

Love Yourself print by Lim Heng Swee (I had to source this image myself before I repinned it. Remember, folks -- DON'T REPIN WITHOUT A PROPER SOURCE!)

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” ~ Martin Luther King,

6. Give time, time.

“Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.” ~ Regina Brett

It takes time to drive out the darkness from our minds and from our hearts. It takes time to heal our wounds and accept the presence of emotional pain into our lives. So give time, time.

don't take these moments for granted

7. Spend time alone with yourself.

When you love someone, you spend private time with that person, quality time. And in the dark moments of our lives, when pain is present in our hearts and in our minds, spending time alone with ourselves is one of the best gift we can give to ourselves.  

Take the time to be alone with yourself. To acknowledge, love and appreciate the parts of you that are beautiful. To love yourself and to know yourself. To rest, time to heal and to fully recover from all that you are feeling.

Hold on to that cozy feeling

“Your light is seen, your heart is known, your soul is cherished by more people than you might imagine. If you knew how many others have been touched in wonderful ways by you, you would be astonished. If you knew how many people feel so much for you, you would be shocked. You are far more wonderful than you think you are. Rest with that. Rest easy with that. Breathe again. You are doing fine. More than fine. Better than fine. You’re doin’ great. So relax. And love yourself today.” ~ Neale Donald Walsch

8. Reach out for help and support.

“Surround yourself with people who make you happy. People who make you laugh, who help you when you’re in need. People who genuinely care. They are the ones worth keeping in your life. Everyone else is just passing through.” ~ Karl Marx (composer)

12 unexpected things to make someones day

Reach out for emotional help and support from those you love and trust. Surround yourself with cheerful and happy people. People who can make you laugh, who can make you see how beautiful life is and who can show you that there’s always something to look forward to.

9. Let nature heal and comfort you. 

“One has to be alone, under the sky, Before everything falls into place and one finds his or her own place in the midst of it all. We have to have the humility to realize ourselves as part of nature.” ~ Thomas Merton

Spend more time outdoors and Look outside in nature for evidence of decay, destruction and death. Of rebirth, rejuvenation, and renewal. And remind yourself that you too are part of nature. Allow nature to be your wise friend, teacher and companion. Allow nature to heal and comfort you. To teach you more about the infinite circle of life. About birth, life, death, rebirth and about yourself.

*

10. Claim nothing as your own.

Love everything but cling on to nothing. Make peace with this idea that nothing in this life lasts forever, that nothing is yours to keep. Live each day as if it were your last. Each moment as if it were your only moment. Make the best of everything life sends your way and waste no time on arguing against what is.

“Most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for and attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities.” ~ Dalai Lama

Sometimes you've got to let go of what distracting you.

“A person who lives moment to moment, who goes on dying to the past, is never attached to anything. Attachment comes from the accumulated past. If you can be unattached to the past every moment, then you are always fresh, young, just born. You pulsate with life and that pulsation gives you immortality. You are immortal, only unaware of the fact.” ~ Osho

11. Turn your wounds into wisdom. 

Every experience that comes your way, comes your way for a reason. Seek to know what that reason is. Seek to learn from every painful experience and every painful interaction life sends your way. Be an alchemist. Turn your wounds into wisdom and your difficulties into opportunities. Let your pain make you better, not bitter.

kushandwizdom

“Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.” ~ Albert Einstein

12. No pain is forever. 

If you’re still alive, if you’re still breathing, it only means that there’s still a lot of life for you out there. A lot of places for you to go to, many new and exciting things to do, to learn and to love. So pick yourself up. Dust yourself off, and start all over again. Start rebuilding your life and make it ridiculously amazing. Don’t let a bad and painful experience make you feel like you have a bad and painful life. Don’t let a rainy day dampen your fun. Never forget that the Sun always shines above the clouds. It’s always up there.

No love like self love...it highers standards

“Our real blessings often appear to us in the shape of pains, losses and disappointments; but let us have patience and we soon shall see them in their proper figures.” ~ Joseph Addison

Source: “12 Tips for Recovering from Emotional Pain,” from purposefairy.com, by Luminita D. Saviuc

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Are You Under Too Much Stress?

Your dad's been under a lot of pressure lately. Hahahaha.

Stress

Everyone experiences stress; it’s almost unavoidable in the modern world. College exams, job interviews, entrance exams for graduate programs, a big deadline at work, and the list is practically endless.

 However, there is a point when stress can start to become truly harmful. If you start experiencing any (or all!) of these signs of stress, it may be time to do something about it.

Fatigue and Problems Sleeping

If you’re having trouble falling asleep or staying asleep (and you can’t blame it on too much caffeine), it’s time to do something about your stress levels.

OMG soooooooo me!!!!!!! my friends get mad at me for sleeping so much i just say well its my hobby get over it.

3 am

Can't sleep... chronic illness #insomnia

Headaches and/or Muscle Pain and Tension

Chances are you know how your body reacts when you’re stressed. Pay attention to what your body is telling you! If you’re uncomfortable, it may be due to the amount of stress you’re under. I carry all my tension in my neck and shoulders, so when that area starts to get uncomfortable, I know I need to take a break.

Dr Oz Headache Relief: Cluster Headache Symptoms & Migraine Remedies    #DrOz #migraine

Stretches to Relieve Neck and Shoulder Tension--need this! That's exactly where my stress goes.

Changes in Mood

You’re rude to a friend out of the blue, you can’t seem to sit still, or you’ve started crying at random intervals. It may be that stress is affecting your mood, and thus your behavior. That’s not to say that you can blame stress for all of your bad moods, but if you can’t seem to shake it you may want to ask yourself if stress is to blame.

Frustrate your characters to keep readers turning pages by One Wild Word

Lack of Motivation or Focus

When we are stressed out we start feeling overwhelmed and don’t know where to begin. When this happens we have an extremely difficult time getting anything done. For some stress can be a motivating factor, but if you’re losing focus on a project that you know is important or that you were previously excited about, stress may be the root of the problem.

Get up !

Overeating or Under Eating

The food you eat is the fuel for everything you do. Both over and under eating can cause problems (the word hangry was created for a reason). So when you notice you’ve drifted away from your typical eating habits, stress may be an underlying cause.

#Binging, #overeating, and #compulsiveeating are band aids for what's really going on just below the surface.

If you realize that you’re experiencing one or more of these factors, try some physical activity or other stress management technique in the short term. Favorite stress-busters are ‘taking positive action,’ exercise, baths, long walks or yoga.

What is stressing you and what can you do about it?

Hate your job?

Your partner is not a good match?

Financial stress?

Feeling hopeless or trapped?

Start making choices and taking baby steps to get you out of the stress.

Start taking some control of the situation no matter how small. ( a little and a little = a lot)

Positive action will make you feel better.

31 Days of Less & More--Day 7:  Less Anxiety.  Join this month long, life-changing challenge to fill your life with less heartache but more joy, less stress but more peace, and less stuff but more contentment.

Taking control of your stress level may help you not only feel better now, but also improve your long term health.

we all need some control because sometimes we are way over the edge. With PTSD our body feels like things are out of control too since our mind body reactions to our memories become automatic when we are triggered.

Scientists have linked stress to a decrease in memory, a weakened immune system, and even weight gain.

Did you know that eating under stress actually decreases your ability to absorb the nutrients?!

Wood Wall Art, Sign, Vintage Style, Hand Painted, Dear Stress Letter. $24.00, via Etsy.

N Lepore (Mind Body Green)