They’re critical, they worry, they pry, they offer their opinions when they haven’t been asked for. They just can’t let you be. And yet, you love them.
Uncertainty and change in the life of a loved one (that’s you) can send them into a tailspin. And it’s not because they’re awful people, it’s usually because they love you and are deeply, genuinely concerned about you.
But that’s their business. Not yours.
Anytime you start a new purpose-driven venture, you are vulnerable.
Your ideas are young and tender, and your emotions may be, too. You need time for things to be soft and unformed.
This is your time to not know, be messy, and not have all the answers.
Perfect fodder for the worriers in your life.
And so, you must protect your infant.
Let me explain…
I’m told that when you’re a new parent and can take your baby home from the hospital, you’re instructed not to take baby out and about to public places for the first six weeks or so. Why? Because there are all kinds of germs and buggies that baby’s system isn’t equipped to fight off yet.
Bebe just got here. She’s susceptible to all kinds of dangers that older kids aren’t. Bebe can’t help it; she’s just a bebe. So mom and dad have to protect her by not dragging her out to Target where something like a stranger’s sneeze or grubby hands could seriously endanger her health.
In this way, your new venture is like a newborn. Your ideas are delicate and not prepared to withstand airborne diseases like criticism, raised eyebrows, and worried voices.
So be careful where you parade your new ideas around. Don’t take your baby to Target.
Not everyone in your life needs to be privy to your new developments. I’m not suggesting that you isolate yourself and try to go through this alone, because that’s not helpful either. You will need support. You will need to talk.
But share this new information with people who can handle it.
And be aware that you may be more sensitive than usual. It’s easy to misconstrue an innocent comment during times of transition.
When you have everything figured out and have a game plan, when you can talk about these changes with confidence and clarity, then consider opening the door to conversation with the worriers. You’ll have answers to their questions, and won’t feel attacked.
So how to handle inquires until then? With honesty and compassion (for you and them).
“You’re so thoughtful to ask. Things are going well, but I’m not quite ready to talk about the details yet.”
“Well, I don’t have all the answers yet, but I’m hot on the trail of something good. I’ll tell you more about it when the time is right.”
“I’m actually keeping things under pretty tight wraps for now. Don’t worry, you’ll hear all about it when I’m ready to make an announcement.”
Simple, straightforward, baby is safe!
By Laura Simms
“An important distinction for us to remember is the difference between our opinions and our truth. We all have opinions—lots of them.
Many of us think our opinions are actually facts, though they’re not! There’s nothing wrong with having and expressing opinions. However, many of them are filled with righteous judgment and an arrogant sense that we’re right and those who don’t agree with us are wrong.
Our “truth” runs much deeper than any of our opinions. Truth is about how we feel and what is real for us. Truth is not about being right; it’s about expressing what we think and feel in an authentic, vulnerable and transparent way.”
~ Mike Robbins
When you are truly being honest with yourself, you will notice that the Synchronicity will always provoke another question about your life direction, which yields another guiding intuition, which results in more Synchronicity — and so on.
When you begin to experience this kind of Synchronistic flow, you are allowing yourself to be guided by your Divinely inspired, higher intelligence. It is moving you toward your soul’s mission. Sure, your ego distractions, and certain life situations, will knock you out of the flow at times, but you have imprinted the experience in your mind, and you’ll soon find your path again.
~ Paul Coehlo
there is no such thing as a monolithic state called depression
I’m reposting this commentary and collection. I’ve added to both the commentary and the link collection since it was last posted. You can always find it in the drop-down navigation at the top of Beyond Meds — under “About” then “Depression.”
People often want to believe that depression has some distinct pathology. It does not. Clinical depression is very much a garbage pail term for feeling shitty and that may manifest in a large number of ways and have many different combinations of etiologies.
This was a popular status update on Facebook:
Depression is always a mixture of many things…there is no such thing as a monolithic state called depression…the fact that people imagine that is the case, is a problem.
The biggest reason it’s a problem is because psychiatry did a criminal…
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I’m not a writer but expressing myself through this blog is healing for me. I have so much to let out but it just isn’t flowing.
What I write is stilted, disjointed and not coming from my centre and I’ve been feeling this way for a very long time.
I re-read my old posts (a year or more back and I’m in awe of how I could express myself).. I just can’t write like that anymore.
This sucks.. I feel like I’ve lost my heart. Maybe I’ve experienced too much pain over the last year.
I hope I can find my heart again, I miss it..