Acknowledging And Healing Your Control Drama
Control Dramas naturally begin in children so they can try to keep control of the sometimes uncertain connection to their parents’ love and attention—to ensure their very survival.
Children scream and throw tantrums to intimidate their parents into paying attention to them—learning to control others by being an Intimidator.
Some will pester their parents with constant questions or blatantly disruptive acts because they were absent or aloof—learning to become an Interrogator to get their attention.
Others will try to hide out or get away with surreptitious disruptive acts because their parents were intrusive and critical—learning to stay Aloof and distant.
Lastly, they may whimper and suck their thumbs in passive reaction to a threatening, intimidating parent—learning to survive by getting others to see them as a helpless Poor Me, needing their attention.
Characteristics of Thriving Children
1. I am capable.
2. I contribute in meaningful ways, and I am genuinely needed.
3. I can influence what happens to me.
4. My feelings are important, and I trust myself to learn from my mistakes. I have self-control and self-discipline.
5. I can make friends. I know how to speak out, listen, cooperate, share, and negotiate for what I want.
6. I can be counted on, and I tell the truth. Things don’t always go my way, but I can adapt when I need to.
7. I try to solve my own problems, but I know that if I need help, I’ll ask for it.
By instilling the seven beliefs above in our children we give them the greatest gift possible. When they really believe that they can make choices, learn what they need to know, and change their lives, they will naturally be able to connect with the flow of energy. As they see how energy responds to their intention, they will attract more coincidences for themselves and make decisions based on being in the flow. Filled with energy and a higher degree of trust in themselves and in the universe, they will be more likely to find and fulfill their purpose.
~ James Redfield